It’s been months since I wrote about how women in America might be feeling as we head into this next era of politics. As I’ve unpacked various aspects of our new political landscape, the consistent refrain from this audience has been: but what should I actually be doing right now?
The rapid-fire pace of changes in this new administration is feeling overwhelming to many of us. So it’s natural that trying to find concrete — and productive — action steps feels similarly daunting. Rather than drowning in a sea of infographics, potentially misleading headlines, and links to donate to ambiguous campaigns, I want to give you all a blueprint for how you can think about your own role as an active member of this community and your own life.
I personally can’t keep up with the posts on social media that are trying to make me feel simultaneously enraged and helpless. It’s an inconvenient truth that these platforms have become our de facto town squares for spreading information. But what happens when our algorithms only feed us the material it knows will elicit a strong reaction (and thus engage, generating income for their bottom lines)? The answer isn’t to simply ignore the news and hope that everything will turn out ok. That’s the action taken by the privileged ones who know that “ignoring” politics really means serving themselves. Instead my aim is to help you move through the next four years with purpose — and with hope — for our collective American future.
Before we get to the concrete action steps (don’t worry, they’re below), I want to quickly spend some time outlining what I believe is the critical work that you need to do as an individual to make identifying these steps infinitely simpler. And that is to, frankly, make sure you know exactly who you are:
First things first, the most important thing you can do is to explicitly define your priorities. Something that I believe has become increasingly toxic in the current political climate is that identifying with one political party (or voting for one particular candidate) is now taken to define every single thing about you and your priorities as an individual. And this is insane. When I turned 18 and was registering for my first ever election, I struggled to contemplate how to register to vote. Maybe there was a party that I felt had more policy positions that I aligned with, but could I “define” myself by that party? I didn’t think so. So I ultimately decided to register as an independent. Now, please forgive me, because I was 18 and didn’t fully understand how our electoral system worked (for example, that only those registered to the relevant political party are eligible to vote in primary elections in many states), so I ultimately changed my registration to reflect that reality.
But the underlying sentiment of a young and naive teenager questioning why I had to make such a grand declaration about “all” of my political beliefs in one fell swoop is even more relevant today. Saying you are a Democrat doesn’t automatically mean you agree with every single policy position outlined on the party’s platform (see here for the latest platform as written by the DNC). Just as labeling yourself a Conservative doesn’t automatically mean you agree with everything that President Trump has done since taking office (see an overview of his Presidential actions here and read the Republican party platform here). Explicitly defining what’s important to you is more critical now than ever before. Because in addition to, quite frankly, being an important thing to know about yourself rather than simply assume. It will also enable you to quickly decide that information to digest versus ignore in today’s overcrowded information landscape.
That brings me to the second part of your prep work: Decide what information to process and what to ignore. There is simply too much information for any single individual to properly digest. And I experience a lot of fear when I realize that my friends — who I consider to be smart, educated, critical thinkers — pass along information as truth based on a headline rather than reading the full article, or don’t question a soundbite before they tout it as fact.
That being said, if it’s impossible to digest the information, then attempting to dig into or fact check it all is a truly insurmountable task. But if you’ve done #1 properly, then you should instinctively know what information is worth YOUR time to dig into versus what you should just skip over. And I truly do mean skip over. Don’t spend time on something that isn’t in your personal priority list, that’s a recipe for exhaustion and whiplash. Instead, focus on what’s truly most important to you, and turn to those that you trust to fill you in on the rest.
Which brings me to my final point of preparation: Take the time to identify who you trust to provide information outside of your top priorities. I personally think it’s important to do this across the board, meaning both for people who largely agree with you and those who don’t. But you need to figure out what approach is right for you. And decide how you can supplement the information you’re ingesting with trusted information that enables you to have a full picture of what’s happening in the world right now. Find those people in your own life that you can have intelligent, non-judgmental conversations with when you disagree. And locate the online commentators and news sources that feel digestible to you.
Once you’ve done the above, it will be much easier for you to think about the tangible steps that you can be taking to feel like you’re making an impact in your community and our country. So without further adieu…how can you as an individual think about taking action these next four years to make an impact on furthering your own individual priorities as a voter, as a community member, and as an American?
I’m breaking this down by the types of actions I personally think are most relevant in today’s political climate.
- Spreading Awareness
- This is the area where I think people are currently spending most of their time, so I’m going to do my best to devote the least time to it here. But whoever said there is no value to posting on social media is clearly not paying attention.
- So keep it up. But also think before you post. The great thing about social media is that it has enabled us to widen our exposure to what’s happening in the world. But it’s also made us feel a misguided obligation to post or have an opinion on literally everything that crosses our feed. This is simply not realistic, and the result is that we end up posting things without discernment and contributing to the spread of misleading or incomplete information. This is why it’s so important to do the above work to figure out your priorities — it’s much easier to spot the incorrect or biased info in a flashy infographic if you’ve done the due diligence on the issues that really matter to you.
- The other element of spreading awareness that I don’t think we spend enough time talking about is sharing what action steps you’re taking with your community. A lot of people don’t realize that calling your reps actually makes an impact — this is how their offices get a pulse check on how their constituents are feeling. Is it perfect? No. But it’s certainly something. If you’ve started calling, then share how easy it is with your community! If even one person sees it and takes action, that’s a win.
- Nurturing Your Community
- How do you set up your community to not only be the right one to share with, but also to be a group that you trust to get information from as well? Your community is everywhere. But curation is everything.
- Where are your existing communities? When most people think about their “communities” the first people that come to mind are their friends and family — and that’s great! Even having this level of support is a huge win for many. But this is also the group most likely to share your political views (or to want to avoid a fight over them), so it’s easy to maintain the illusion that everyone is on the same page and thus there’s not really much of a difference you can make. This is why I contend that it’s very important to have members of your community whose political opinions diverge from your own. Think you don’t know anyone who voted for the other party? Think again. Start small — I’ll bet your office has a wider spectrum of beliefs than you’d imagine. I’m not advocating for getting into political debates at work (do not tell HR I sent you), but I am advocating for being open to having a discussion with someone other than your work wife over your lunch break.
- Have a book club? Every book — fiction or nonfiction — has underlying values that fueled the author to write it in the first place. Don’t be afraid to bring them up for discussion with the group! Attend church or temple? Part of a mom (or dad) play group? Frequent a workout studio or gym? Bring your laptop to your neighborhood coffee shop and know the baristas? Whether you realize it or not, these places and the people in them are already a part of your community. You just need to be willing to engage with them.
- Expanding Your Community
- Of course, part of the reason people have been pestering me about writing this particular article (jk I love it when you guys tell me you want me to write about something, keep on nagging) is that a lot of you have realized recently that you’re not satisfied with your current community. Whether it be because you’re single and are looking to date without relying on the apps, because you’re transitioning into a new life stage and are looking for a different support system, or because you’re overwhelmed by what’s happening in politics right now and want to meet more people who are eager to make an impact — the goal is clear, you’re all looking for new connections. So how do you find the right ones?
- The first one’s easy — look for it more in your everyday life. Maybe you read the above list and felt bummed that you don’t know your local barista (shoutout Jorge 👋). But small acts of connection are right outside your doorstep: start attending a workout class at the same time each week and smile at the people next to you. Actually answer when the cashier at your lunchtime salad spot asks how you’re doing — and ask them back. If nothing comes from these interactions other than a simple nod or quick conversation with someone you’ll never see again, it’s still a small point of connection. And I promise that each one will make you feel slightly less alone.
- There are also numerous apps and meetup groups that are popping up all over for both singles and non-singles who are simply looking to expand their networks. In NYC alone I’ve been invited to join Conquer (for finding local pickleball games to join), Kndrd (more geared towards women looking for their ✨sisters ✨), and numerous new dating-related apps like Breeze, Lara, and Duet. I’m not personally looking for more digital proxies for meeting people irl, but if that makes it feel easier for you, go for it!
- Looking for more offline ways to connect but don’t frequent specific places in the neighborhood or feel like you’re finding them in your everyday? Look for groups that share your interests — political or otherwise — and see if you can attend an event.
- Museums frequently have “young patron” programs with events or programming to keep the younger generations engaged (my personal favorite is always the natural history museums because you get to play with dinosaurs).
- If your city has an orchestra, local theater, comedy club or improv school, art classes (I’ve gotten very into stone carving lately), adult language schools (I should brush up on my Spanish before a summer trip to Mexico) — go just one time and see if you like being there.
- Don’t see anything that piques your interest? Create it! Book clubs are having a renaissance, but I’ll admit I’ve been tempted to create a “theater club” for my friends where we watch a movie adaptation or recording of a production together over popcorn then discuss it after. Maybe create a Podcast Pod — invite a group over to listen to a particular podcast episode and dissect it all together after over wine.
- While not directly political actions, I feel strongly that having a solid community around you is critical to 1. Finding your fellow activists, 2. Organically learning more about activities happening around you, and 3. Expanding your worldview by naturally inviting more opinions into your orbit.
- Looking for more explicitly political communities? I get that. And this is where you need to go back to that prep work and revisit your own top priorities. Seeking out more cause or policy-specific communities is amazing, but can be just as overwhelming as the news cycle these days between the large, established players and the numerous grassroots organizations coming up all over the country. So revisit what’s most important to you and start digging.
- For example, if my top priority was (obvs) reproductive rights, then the big players would be organizations like: Planned Parenthood, Reproductive Freedom For All (formerly NARAL), and Center for Reproductive Rights. These are great resources to understand at the highest level what is happening with regards to policies surrounding reproductive freedoms. But I’ll be honest with you — I don’t find them particularly helpful when determining how to actually help.
- Then maybe you try to drill down to the next level. Are there other organizations or events locally that could help me personally feel more involved? Look into volunteering at a shelter for victims of domestic violence, check out your local library to see if they need any help (or at least get a library card! This in and of itself demonstrates demand for the service), see if any of the above organizations have local chapters that hold fundraisers or events. Ask around in your above community to see what smaller organizations might be popping up that you haven’t heard of. Are letter writing campaigns still a thing? What about engagement pods on social media like influencers use, but for the express purpose of amplifying political content?
- In a more hyper local but not policy-specific agenda, I’ve also been trying to stay more informed about what’s happening in my local municipality. I now attend my block association meetings (I’m the youngest person there by…well…a lot…), I stay up to date with my local council member (not sure who yours is? Here’s a resource for those of us in NYC to look them up), and I make sure I’m aware when local elections are happening in my area rather than just waiting for the big flashy campaigns.
- Being a Contributing Community Member
- In order to productively participate in any community, you first and foremost need to be a contributing community member. We’re all incredibly busy (I contend that the vast majority of this audience is probably part of the so-called exhausted majority that everyone talks about), so what’s most important is picking the actions you can reasonably take without feeling burnt out. And what might be more important to you as an individual to feel like you’re making a difference.
- I recently got back into donating blood regularly. I want to re-up my CPR certification (does anyone in NYC know the best place to find an in-person class?). And as I mentioned I’d love to brush off my old Spanish skills ahead of some summer travel. None of these are political acts, but they are things that make me feel like a contributing member of society. And they’re important to me.
- For you this may be donating to causes you find important if you don’t have the time to attend events or organize your own. Maybe you love to volunteer at your local animal shelter (more power to you, I would bring literally every puppy home with me) or even foster animals while they search for their forever home. Whatever it may be, don’t let anyone make you feel like these small, individual acts have no impact — they add up, and more importantly they build you as an individual into the best community member you can be.
- Voting
- Finally, I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the single most impactful individual action you take within the realm of our current political ecosystem — please vote. And not just in the general elections. Please vote in EVERY election where you are eligible. Our system is largely set up to benefit the extremes, whether that’s the above-mentioned restriction on primary voting or the fact that you may not even know that a local election is happening. Make sure you show up and vote. Every time.
- Not sure where to find out about your local or municipal elections? Check out an overview by state, search by your address, and follow your rep and senator.
- Learn about local meetings where you might participate. I mentioned that I attend my local block association meetings, but I’d love to know what else is happening in my area and it’s so hard to find! Any tips on where to look?
If you found this article overwhelming. Me too! Imagine how much fun I had writing it 😉
This is a very long but by no means exhaustive list of things we could all be doing to get more involved and (hopefully) make an impact. But it’s just the beginning. Do you want to hear more about the specific ways I’m getting involved? Prefer the higher-level commentary you see in other articles? Let me know. I’m here to help.
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